Priorities & Focus
August 25, 2020
Learning how to 'tame the beast' of routine takes practice and there are strategies that make it so much easier. Listen today to start getting your focus and intent in line with what you really want.
Priorities & Focus
The Mom Training Podcast with Diana Ballard
Diana: So, today we're going to talk about a really important piece of learning - how to have a successful routine, how to organize yourself, how to have peace in what you're doing, and keep the things that are most important to you as your top priority. Now, if someone were to ask you, “What is your top priority?” I mean, what would you say?
I feel like most people would be like, “Oh, well, my family, of course.”
But where are we spending our time? Where are we focusing our attention?
One of the biggest things with helping life flow smoothly is adjusting things to protect what is most important. And it's almost a law of life, that as we protect what's important to us, then we have a lot more time, a lot more energy, a lot more focus.
Turning our focus towards our marriage and taking the time needed to strengthen our marriage saves us time in the long run. It saves us time with fighting. Saves us time with having to mend hurt feelings, or do things on our own or pride or whatever else comes with, when we don’t put our marriage as a priority.
Or taking care of our body. We run, run, run. We’re just so busy and active and doing all these things, and helping all these other people. But then, behind the scenes, we're letting ourselves fall apart. And that can be so damaging to us.
Or being so pressed by consumerism of, you know, “I got to have this type of house, these types of clothes, this type of car… We have to celebrate birthdays this way. But in the meantime, we're missing out on some really cute and awesome bonding moments with our kids.
So, what are your priorities? Have you sat down and wrote them down? Have you been able to, look at that list kind of hold it up to what you do with your time and energy?
Then, as you look at that time, you look at that list, and say to yourself, “Am I happy? Am I peaceful? Or am I feeling stressed out?... Upset all the time. Anxious if I'm doing the right thing.
When you get your priorities in order, when you focus on what's most important, then a lot of that negative, those feelings and feeling, “Am I doing enough? Am I doing what I'm supposed to be doing?”
A lot of that falls away, when you say, “I see that I'm off track here. I need to adjust some things.” and that brings you peace of, “I'm taking something that's important to me, and I'm going to turn my focus towards spending more time with my kids. Spending more time on my health… With my husband, cleaning my house”, whatever it may be.
But as we've talked about with taming the beast, this is going to be your main key to taming the beast, is knowing what your priorities are, and how to how to protect them, how to mold your schedule around.
And a lot of the things that are distracting us from our priorities are things that matter too. “Oh, I can save a little money over here if I do this thing.” or “I can make more money over here if I did this thing.” or “I want to prepare for the future, so I'm going to focus on working towards something.”
I mean, there's a lot of things that distract us from taking care of what's important right now. Being in the moment, loving the people that are close to us...
And I don't know… I don't know about you but I don't like feeling imbalanced. It’s not a fun feeling. And for us to be able to tame the beast of routine and organization, and making sure that we're covering the bases that actually mean something to us.
Like there are things that are going to be flashing lights, shiny things that sounds way more fun than doing the mundane every day, or doing the dishes, or working through relationships, or reading the fifth book in one sitting. There's things that are flashy to us that will try to take us away from that.
But can we pull it back to enjoy, just set aside time of taking the time to read as many books as you want, or have a better conversation with your husband than you have in a long time, or taking care of yourself. I mean, there's a lot of things that we could shift in our day, and in our to-do-list that maybe just need to either leave the to-do-list or we put more on the backburner so that we can enjoy what's truly important to us.
So, think about what's truly important to you. And I guarantee that your kids are on that list. And where are they on that list? Are they above having a nice house? Are they below, having a nice house or having the new upgrade things, having the house that’s perfectly put together?
I mean, trust me. Trust me. I've been going and we're organizing things. And we just are almost finished with remodeling the basement and so I've been picking up some… I picked up shelves today to organize the storage room, all this kind of stuff. Man, some of these houses, that we were driving through the neighborhoods, oh my goodness.
I mean, you can't help but look at those houses and be like, “Wow, wouldn't it be so nice to live in one of those beautiful houses with the huge windows and perfectly put together a lawn. So, much space and three car garage. Just how much space they have in there, oodles and oodles of space, and high ceilings. Just beauty and all these homes.
But one, a lot of us are not at that point yet. Most of those people that live in those homes are like middle aged, their kids already grown up. They've paid their dues in life to work hard become who they are, have successful businesses or they're retired now. I mean, most people that live in those types of homes are not young families.
If they are awesome. Totally cool… But I get you when it's like, “But I want to live there”, and I know. Just today, I was like, “Oh man, look at that nice house that probably doesn't need to be remodeled at all or doesn't have any type of problems with it, and things aren't falling apart, and all this kind of stuff…Wow, it’d be so nice, how beautiful… Look at those colors.” It's hard to keep your mind where you're at.
Now, we always talk about growing, becoming more and working on things. But are we thinking about where we're going? What we want to do? More than what we're doing in the current moment, in the current day, right now.
Like I'm going to throw a red flag. Are you more focused on the future? And who you can become, what you can do and missing the moments right now. I mean, that's a real thing, especially for people who like to drive things, and push things, and accomplish things.
We have to realize that in our homes, right now, is something really important. And that every single day that we're doing stuff with our kids, and our husbands, and taking care of our self is so important for our success in the future.
So, as you're figuring out your priorities, as you're figuring out what you need to do, to adjust your priorities, how do you take care of your family, take care of yourself, and not feel the stress of being imbalanced with your priorities… Because that suck. It sucks.
And then think to yourself as you're thinking about those priorities. Am I imbalanced in working towards my future? Or maintaining consumerism more than my concern about what's going on in my home right now; the influence that I have with my kids and with my husband and my life right now. Because if we want to tame the beast, if we want routine to work for us, and not the other way around, to have things whip you back and forth, and back and forth.
If we want to be more peaceful, more balanced and love our life, we have to be in the moment, enjoying the moments as much as possible. And now I know that's easier said than done. But if you sit down and do what I just told you to do, with writing out your priorities, figuring out what's most important to you and where your time and energy is going, and realize, “Am I so much in the future and so much of what I want, instead of enjoying what I already have?”
Because if I don't enjoy what I already have, then what’s going to make me enjoy what I have in the future? Because I guarantee that you have way more right now, than you did five years ago. Just look around at what you have. You have way more right now than you did five years ago,10 years ago, 20 years ago.
Look how far you've come. Enjoy where you're at right now. And as you work towards the future, as you're killing that routine, to get everything in that you need, to become the person that you want to, to grow your income, to get out of debt, to just build whatever you want to create and do.
Enjoy where you're at. Love your life. And that right there, enjoying where you're at, prospering where you're planted right there, is your biggest tip to taming the beast of routine
So, hope you have a great rest of your day. Go and work on that. You're awesome. And let's tame that beast, girls. We'll see you next week on The Mom Training Podcast.
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