Peaceful Parenting with Dr. Laura Froyen

Episode Transcript

​

The Mom Training Podcast with Diana Ballard

 

Diana:   Hey ladies, welcome to The Mom Training Podcast. It is such a treat today because we have Laura Froyen with us today, who is absolutely amazing. Now, Laura, tell us a little bit about yourself, like what you do and a little bit about your passion.

​

Laura:    Yeah, absolutely. So, I have my PhD in Human Development and Family Studies with a specialization in Marriage and Family Therapy. And so, I was a practicing family and couple therapist for a while. I also was a professor, where I studied how parenting influences child development. But I left academia because I was really feeling confined in my ability to actually help parents who needed it most. And I wasn't able to maintain balance in my own life.

 

  So now, I get to work with families all over this beautiful world, as they try to figure out what their big priorities and values are in their parenting and in their family lives. And then start living in alignment with those big goals and values.

 

Diana:    So, what is something that you feel has been a main priority, like have you seen like a, I don’t know, a pattern when you're talking with people about what people's priorities are?

​

Laura:    Yeah. So, lots of people want their kids to come out of their childhood knowing that they are worthy and lovable, exactly as they are. So, they want their kids to feel unconditional love and acceptance from their parents. And then the other big one, that I see a lot, is that they want their kids to be successful. Of course, successful means a lot of different things to a lot of different people. But that is a word that comes up a lot.

 

  They want their kids to feel seen and heard and valued, know how to know what a healthy relationship looks like, have a healthy relationship with themselves. And also, be successful, whether that's financially, having a family… Kind of whatever that means to the family.

 

Diana:    Okay. So, do you feel like most of those parents that are coming to you, maybe didn't have that?

​

Laura:    Uh-hmm.

​

Diana:   You know, coming from families that maybe they didn't feel that they were loved or cherished the way that they were. Like, what's been your experience with that?

 

Laura:    Yeah. Most of the grown-ups I get to work with have this… Have somewhere along the line, often very unintentionally from their parents… But somewhere, they got the idea that there were parts of themselves that weren't lovable or acceptable. Or parts of themselves that they needed to hide or prune away, in order to be lovable and acceptable. And this is a story that’s as old as time.

​

 These things have been passed down from generation to generation. Parents unwittingly, give that message to children, sometimes, through really harsh parenting through abuse. And sometimes, through not so harsh parenting, just kind of everyday like, “Gosh what's wrong with you? Why can't you put your shoes on?” That kind of this just gentle kind of just lesser stuff, still sends that message.

 

  And so, most of the parents I work with are trying to figure out, “Okay. So, how do I teach my kids to feel unconditionally worthy and lovable, when I don't necessarily know that about myself.” And that, for me in my work with parents, it always starts with the parent. You cannot offer your kids, an environment in which they are unconditionally loved, if you're not also offering that environment to yourself.

 

Diana:    Right. I mean that puts a lot of pressure on parents [chuckle]…

​

Laura:    Yeah.

 

Diana:   To make sure that those bases are covered. And I know that my parents tried their best, and their parents try their best, and they weren't trying to mess their kid up. But I mean, maybe there are situations where people are actively really being mean or abusive, like you said. But I think a lot of times parents are really trying their best to create…

​

Laura:    They are.

 

Diana:   The best situation that they can. But again, if they're wounded, if they have things that they have believed from their childhood and bring with them, like it just creates a bunch of problems. So, I'm curious about like, say that you work with those parents, and it brings in… Say they have like specific… You said you work with them, so like they have specific triggers that will really set them off, or make it like… Are those the kind of things you have to work with?

 

Laura:   Yeah, yeah. And I just want to mentioned something. So, in no way do I ever want to give the impression that a parent has to be perfect, in order to have those bigger picture outcomes.

 

  So oftentimes, we get those ideas simply because of a miscommunication between parents and children. So, parents are doing their best, they are trying to keep their kids safe, they're trying to help their kids be successful and they miscommunicate. And kids misunderstand what parents are doing.

 

  Most of us have our own wounds that we look back on and think about like, “Why did my parent do that?” If we really got into our parents’ head, they had the best of intentions. They were trying to teach us something to keep us safe, or teach us something to help us be successful. And it wounded. And that's just the fact that there's miscommunications in relationships from time to time.

 

  Most of the parents that I work with are attempting to be more respectful or conscious parents. There's lots of different definitions for these terms… Or gentle parents or positive parents using positive discipline, or peaceful parenting. Where they're trying to move away from punitive approaches to discipline, and use more positive approaches to discipline. Where discipline instead of meaning punishment, discipline means guidance and teaching.

 

  Most of the parents I work with know what they're supposed to be able to say and do with their kids. They know the right thing to do. They know how they should be parenting. But there's certain points in their day to day lives with their kids where they are so reactive that there's not enough space in between, kind of when the kid does something and when words are falling out of their mouth, to actually parent the way that they know that they're supposed to; know that they want to.

 

  So that, they end up almost by accident, parenting outside of alignment with their higher goals. Because there's a number of different reasons why that reactivity can be so high for parents. But usually, it has to do with some trigger or some flooding of emotion, where they're flooded with negative emotion, and can't think rationally and can't choose and consciously decide how to parent. They’re just parenting based on really old scripts. Scripts that have been handed down through their family for generations.

 

  One of mine, for example, is in my home growing up, frustration and whining were not tolerated. My mom met that with, “Stop that, right now.” And that's my default. So, when I hear whining and frustration and when I'm stressed out, maybe haven't had a chance to do my yoga or go for a walk. And I haven't had a time to take good care of myself, my window of tolerance is narrowed. That's my like… I have to work really, really hard to not say, “Stop that, right now.” That's just the pattern.

 

  Luckily for me, I became aware of that pattern with my niece before I was a mom. So, I started working on that, years before I was…

​

Diana:    When you’re still single?

​

Laura:    Yeah, before I was a mom. So, that one is fine for me right now, but it's still… Our neural pathways are so interesting. It's like being on a highway. And so, I don't know, probably everybody who's listening has had moments like these where you… Like my daughter changed schools, between when she was two and three. And the first week of her going to that new school I cannot tell you the number of times I ended up in her old school’s parking lot… You know what I mean?

 

[chuckles]

 

  Because you’re just like it's just going through the motion. This is your habit. This is like, “Okay, in the morning I drive my kid to school and this is where I go”. And our brains are the same way. We have all these neural highways in our brain, and like before we know it, we're on to this road that we're used to going on. And so, learning something new is about rebuilding neural pathways and yeah… That's what I love to do… I don’t know. That's what I love to do.

 

Diana:    Okay, so, it sounds like the first step is being aware of that there might be like a potential reactor or a trigger. And then so, the second step is learning how to create the new neural pathways.

 

Laura:    Yeah.

 

Diana:   So, what are some ways that we could do that? Like when we were like high in emotion… I love what you say that like, it really is like this flood of emotion when we get upset about something. We're like, “I don't know where this came from but yeah, stop the whining”, or “Get out of my stuff”, or “Stop touching things”, or “Why did you do that?”

 

Laura:      “Just listen to me.”

 

Diana:      Exactly, yeah.

 

Laura:      Yeah.

​

Diana:     So, how do we make those new neural pathways?

​

Laura:    You're going to love this. You're going to love this. You train your brain. You train it. I have this… So, once you're aware of where your triggers are, and most of us can make a lovely little roadmap of our days with our kids and note exactly where they are, we can predict pretty clearly when we're going to get flooded. There's certain situations that usually flood us.

 

  So, once we've got that little roadmap, then we can use… I call this the Triple P Method for Getting the Pause, because that's what parents want. They want to not be reactive with their kids, they want to be responsive. And in order to do that, you've got to get a little bit of space and time for when you can make a conscious decision on what you're going to do with your kids.

 

  The first P is practicing. You would not go out and run a marathon tomorrow, if you have not been running for years. Right? So, you would practice. You would train your body to be ready for that. You'd start it off slow. If you're me, I don't run, I would start off with walking. I would work up to walking and jogging, and longer and longer distances. We would work up to it.

 

  So, with this, you need to train your brain and you need to train your nervous system to calm. There's lots of different methods to do this. So, one is training your nervous system that when these things happen, so that your nervous system is well conditioned to downshift, and get into a soothe state. You can do this with mindfulness, with meditation. I personally love very, very short self-compassion-based meditations; just a simple loving kindness meditation. That is easy…

 

Diana:    Oh, I love that.

 

Laura:    Oh, yeah. And what I do, what works for me, is that anytime I practice it, I always put my hand on my heart, and feel the kindness and love come in, to me; that I'm offering to myself. And then in those moments where it starts to flood, the emotion starts roiling, I can feel it coming on, I put my hand there… And it's this, I call it a beneficial trigger. It's an anchor. It's something that down shifts your nervous system right away. And since I practice it regularly, outside of these moments, as soon as my hands on my heart, my body is already calming itself down, without me having to do anything thoughts-wise... Does that make sense?

 

Diana:    Oh, wow… Yeah. Well, I've learned about EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique), which I can’t…

 

Laura:     Yeah. Tapping is another great one, that I love.

 

Diana:   And how you can make triggers on other people, like when you’re doing therapy and stuff. But I never thought about doing that to myself. Like if I put my hand on my heart… When I've had babies, I’ve practice things with my husband of when he puts his hand on my forehead it’s supposed to do something; relax me or whatever.

 

Laura:     Exactly.

 

Diana:     But I had never thought about, “Hey, like what if I…” I love that. The kindness…You know, touching my heart like, “Hey,” I can bring in like, “I'm a good person. I'm doing great. I'm a good mom. I'm blessed…”

 

Laura:    Yeah, whatever feels good.

 

Diana:    Whatever you feel like you need… I love that. That's wonderful.

 

Laura:    Yeah. One thing that my clients also really like to do, especially for clients who have like a nervous or anxious habit… Like I had one who spins her wedding ring, when she's nervous or anxious. So, if you know you got one of those habits, where you twiddle something or maybe you play with your necklace… Like that is something I do sometimes. You can intentionally do the loving kindness meditation, or the affirmations while doing that, while you're doing this nervous habit, and you're retraining your brain then.

 

  So, when I'm feeling anxious and I naturally go to flipping my ring, twiddling my rings or playing with my hair for example, is another one, then you're retraining your body that that habit means, “Oh, I'm calming down now.” That's, “When I do that, that means I'm soothing myself… Oh, when I do that, that means I'm being kind to myself.”

 

  And it is a beautiful way to hijack your powerful brain. Because your brain likes things to be easy. Your brain is very, very lazy, and efficient. It does not want things to be difficult. So, as soon as it gets the idea of like, “Oh, we're doing this now?” or “We're going to think of this now?”, it’s your partner. It wants to think the new thing, because it doesn't want to have to be effortful anymore.

 

Diana:    Right… Well, you talking about that, about being able to calm ourselves down and different thing's, I'll tell you, when I don't get enough sleep, I can really be dangerous.

 

[chuckles]

 

  I mean, seriously. I get so imbalanced when I don't get enough sleep. Like I go on vacation and people are like, “Why are you going to bed? It’s 8:30.” I'm like, “Because my kids are going to be up at five in the morning because we're at a different time zone. I'm not going to stay up with the adults because I want to have a good day tomorrow.”

 

Laura:     I want to enjoy myself…

 

Diana:    Yeah. “And be nice to my kids.”

 

Laura:    And not yell at my kid. [chuckle]

 

Diana:    Exactly. I think it really is knowing your limits, too.

 

Laura:     Yeah.

 

Diana:    Because if your like…

 

Laura:    That window of tolerance. Do you guys know that phrase? Is that something you’ve discussed on the podcast? That window of tolerance?

 

Diana:     No. I haven’t. Tell me a little bit about that.

 

Laura:    Yeah, yeah. So, we all have this of tolerance. You can think about it either, just like a window that you would look out in your house, and the window gets bigger or smaller, based on what you've got going on in your life. Things that you can handle well and smoothly fall in your window, and things that are hard to handle fall outside of your window.

 

  And so, like if you've noticed, Diana, that when you've got a really lovely night's sleep. You're really well rested your window is quite wide. It's nice and open. You can handle the ups and downs. You can handle things your kids throw at you. You can handle them really well.

 

  But when you haven’t had that good night's sleep, your window narrows, quite a bit. And the things that would not have pushed you over the edge on a well-rested day would. And so, being really clear on what widens our window of tolerance.

 

  For me, being outside of for an hour or so, every day has a huge impact on my window. I have to be able to have it. I also really need at least an hour or so, a day where no one talks to me. That's really important for my window. And so, that means I build that into my day with my kids. So, when we were in quarantine, my kids had like, “This is mommy's quiet hour. You are not allowed to talk to her.” [chuckle] So, that I didn't yell at them.

 

  And so, we all have to figure out what impacts our windows. And then start building our lives to support those windows being nice and wide open for our kids and for our families. So, that we can show up as our best selves.

 

Diana:    That’s awesome. So, say that someone is like working on… So, say they… Going through the steps again… They've acknowledged that, “Okay, this is someplace I need to work on…”

 

Laura:    Oh, yeah. We didn't do the rest of the Ps…

​

Diana:    Oh, yeah. Tell me the Ps. Finish the Ps for me. [chuckle]

​

Laura:    Yeah, yeah, the Ps. So, the first P is Practice, and then the next one is Prepare. So, again if you're making this kind of roadmap of your days, where you know where the landmines are, so you're not surprised by them anymore, then you can actually be proactive and prepared.

 

  Perhaps, if there are things that consistently come up for you and your kids, you can have a proactive problem-solving conversation about those. If they are things that happen every day but it's just the fact that your kid is three and so they resist transitions, at least you know that. So, you know that you can take a second before you go in any transition… Because three-year-olds, three- to five-year-olds do not like transitions. They're really hard for them.

 

  So, you know that. You know your kid is in that stage. You can take a moment and say, “Okay. So, I'm about to go in here and tell him that he's got to put his Legos away and put his shoes on, because we're going to school… [deep breath] Okay, I'm going to be so kind to myself. We can handle this.” And you can give yourself a little bit of self-talk and you can be ready for those moments. So, that when he says, “No, I'm not doing it.” You're there. You're ready for it. You know what to say. You're prepared. So, that’s the second P.

 

  And that really kind of goes along with this plan. So, having an actual plan, not just for what you're going to do with your kid, but a plan for your mindset. And a plan for what you're going to be saying to yourself, and how… Like a plan for your day, a lot of what you teach, I think, is probably really, really helpful and can be applied very well to this.

 

  So, if we have this roadmap we know in our life where our triggers are, where they’re going to be popping up. We have these great skills that you've been teaching in your podcast all along. We can apply them to these scenarios to make life just a little bit easier on ourselves and on our kids.

 

Diana:   I love that. Well, that reminds me, something that I love to talk about and teach is called pre-gaming. And it's where…

 

Laura:    It's not what we did in college.

 

[chuckles]

 

Diana:    Kind of… No. I’m just kidding.

 

[laughter]

 

Laura:    I’m sorry. [laughter]

 

Diana:    No. Joking. That's kind of where I came from. Okay. But no so, pre-gaming meaning before the big moment, I'm building up my kids or even my husband, or whatever, “Hey, do you know that this is going to be the next step - is after we finished lunch, we're all going to get our shoes, and our jackets, and we're going to get in the car because we're going to the store.”

 

Laura:    Yeah.

 

Diana:    And so, it's kind of setting them up. And it helps me a lot too because if it's after lunch and I’m like, “Okay, everyone, get your shoes and your jacket. Get in the car.” Like I have one child, that’ll be like, “Wahh…” I mean he'll freak out because he's feels like he's in like this big rush and that he's going to get left. He doesn't… He's just out of, you know.

 

  But if I take a moment, and pre-game him and say, “Hey, just to let you know, when you're finished with your lunch, you need to get your shoes and your jacket and we're going to get in the car.” Literally, the instant he's done with his lunch, his shoes, his jacket and he’s headed outside for me. And there's no problem.

 

  And for me, I really don't like the tantrums either. I don't put up with them. It just is like, “Sorry, that's not going to work here.” So, if you want to talk to me like that's great, but if I'm not rested then it's like, “Stop that right now.” Like you were saying.

 

Laura:    Yeah.

 

Diana:   But the pre-gaming, of like, “Hey, just letting you now…” It prevents the problem. It prevents the thing that could push me over too, and have him have this big, freak out moment of not knowing what's happening or whenever. He likes to be prepared. He likes to know beforehand.

 

  So, that's something that's definitely worked for me to help prevent those moments too. It’s like what you're saying with preparing, with the plan. Being able to pre-games. So, it’s like another P there.

 

Laura:    Yeah.

 

Diana:    Being able to... My plan is to help them understand what the next step is before we even get there, and it prevents a lot problems.

 

Laura:   Yeah, and that's beautiful. And these things are like… These Ps are things that work for most people. Most people like to know a little bit about what's coming up next. Most people like to feel like they've got some direction. Most people like a chance to practice things. And so, these pieces can also be used for when you've got tricky things coming up. Like when you are needing to prep your kid for getting a shot or a dentist appointment. These all apply. These are beautiful skills to be teaching your kids, to be using yourself, to be modelling for your kids.

 

  These are all good things and these are things that you don't have to be quiet or sneaky about either. You can say like, “Okay so, we're going to be… We have to run to the grocery store.” It's really, really hard sometimes for me to go to the grocery store with all the kids because everybody's asking things, I can't concentrate on the list.

​

  Okay, so, what do I need to do to make myself successful. You can be talking about this out loud with your kids. So, you're modelling, this part, “Okay. So, right now, I'm going to take a few minutes just to be calm. Be kind to myself.” I'm going to have a nice little thing I can say to myself when I start getting frustrated… “Kids, we all are going to be on the same page. This is our list, take a look at it. Is there anything you want to add to it right now? Let's discuss it. Because once it's not on the list, we're not… You certainly are welcome to look at the things in the store, but we're not buying things that are not on this list. Okay. All right. Does anybody need pocket money from their savings that they want to bring with them?... Okay. All right, we've got our plan, and now we can go.”

 

Diana:    [inaudible]

​

Laura:   Yeah. These are beautiful things to do for ourselves when we know like... There's times, when we show up in our parenting in a way that is not… We know it's not us. It’s not what we want. And that's part of learning and growing as a parent. Like that happens to everyone. It happens to me.

 

  It's just part of it, but we don't have to just try to white knuckle our way through it. There's things we can do to make it easier and to actually make lasting change. Like literally, change the structure of our brain, so that we have new habits. Instead of old ones that have been passed down through our family for generations.

 

Diana:    What I love about what you just said right there, is that it's not just about like, “Oh, I hope that this happens.” It's like literally is a scientific thing. You can literally change your brain. [chuckle] You can literally change the neural pathways of your brain to think differently, to live differently to… It's like, “Oh, you know what, that actually gives me a lot more hope that like, I'm not just sitting here wishing and praying and hoping that… Oh, life will change.”

 

  No, it's like actually scientifically proven. If you practice different things, then your brain literally changes. Like that’s cool.

 

Laura:   It looks different when they take a picture of it. Like literally, looks different. It lights up differently too. Especially, if you're using a compassion-based method, different parts of the emotional centers of your brain light up differently. It's beautiful. Our brains are gorgeous, and wonderful, and we should not be afraid to use them for our benefit. They're here to serve us. They're our partners in this.

 

  And yeah, it’s definitely, it is not something that we…And it also doesn't take a lot of time. So, like - I will never… I'm a kind of an anxious person. Sitting still doing one thing for a prolonged period of time is hard for me. I will never be able to do a 20-minute meditation.

 

  Hypnosis, I can do. Like if someone's guiding me, with like a real person that I'm emotionally connected to, I could probably do it. But I got five minutes, when I'm on my own. When it's just me, five minutes is my max. So, most of the time, when I'm doing a loving kindness meditation, it's like 30 seconds at a red light or the minute that I'm standing waiting in line at the grocery store. Instead of scrolling through Instagram and Facebook, I will spend the first part going through a little bit of a loving kindness meditation.

 

  Those are really simple and easy. You can Google it, there's a million on Pinterest and YouTube. And it’s just four lines. I just like four lines, very simple. I have it memorized. It’s always available to me.

 

  Yeah, it doesn't have to be… I don't know, I think meditation can seem really, really daunting and hard. And it does not have to be.

 

Diana:    Or boring, to some people. [chuckle]

 

Laura:    Or boring, yeah. Or like, I mean, even just a moment of like mindful noticing, is also really good for your nervous system. It doesn't even have to be with mantras or affirmations just like, “Ha, what do my feet feel like?” I'm standing in line at the grocery store, “What do my feet feel like in my shoes? Where's the seam on my sock? There it is. Ha”, just noticing. Just noticing things also trains your brain to be more present, to slow down.

 

  And those are all good things, when you're working with kids.

 

Diana:   That’s really cool. No, I love that. Because, I mean, it is about being in the moment. It is about having that hope. It is about reaching for better things. And the scientific side of your brain, coming together it's just everything that comes together to create a new moment is because really it is about our choice.

 

  It's about using our own choice to say, “This is what I'm going to let my brain do. This is what direction I want to go.” And it's utilizing that choice to solidify those new neural pathways. Would you agree?

 

Laura:    Absolutely. And that's what conscious parenting is. Conscious parenting is not a set of tips or tools or tricks that you can use with your kids. It is that, exactly what you just said. It is like slowing down, noticing what you've been conditioned to respond to certain things in certain ways, and then deciding. Making a conscious choice. “No, this is what I'm going to think about my kid. This is what I'm going to choose to think about my partner. This is where I'm going to choose to think about myself in this moment. And this is what I'm going to choose to do. This is what I choose to say. I'm not going to say something out of habit. I'm not going to say something because my parents said it to me. I'm not going to say something because culture has some different idea of what kids need to be successful”.

 

Diana:    Exactly.

 

Laura:     I’m going to choose right now. This is what matters to me.

 

Diana:     And that is where the true empowerment comes from. It really is.

 

Laura:    Yeah, yeah. It's so powerful. And I think lots of parents would want me to say like, “Okay. What do I do? What do I say?” and that's… You will know when you slow down and you start listening to yourself, you'll know what to say. You will. That slowing down, tuning in… We have beautiful intuition, moms especially. Oh my gosh, we are so incredibly wise that if we can just filter out the noise and all the 'shoulds' ... We have such great intuition.

 

Diana:    Totally agree… Oh, I love that. Cool.

 

  So, what is one, like, say someone's listening right now, and they're like, “Where do I get started?” Like someone that's never thought about maybe conscious parenting or like thinking about not reacting in certain ways… Speak to that person right now. That’s completely new coming to you saying, “Help me.” What would you say to them?

 

Laura:  Yeah. I mean taking just a little bit of time to journal, hopefully handwriting it too. I'm really passionate about handwriting in journaling. It’s again, I'm a little bit of a nerd, but there's hard science, that shows that we process and retain information better when we hand write it.

 

  So, hand write and just get curious with yourself. “What do I want out of my motherhood? What do I want out of my time with my children? If my kids look back on their childhood, what do I want them to remember about me and about our relationship and their time with me? What do I want them to know about themselves as they come out of a childhood spent with me? And how can that impact what I do on a daily basis?”

 

  Just as an example, if we want our… I have two strong willed, fierce daughters. I want them to stand up for themselves. I want them to go out into this world, and take no crap from anybody. I want them to push back. I want them to get what they want. I want them to know themselves and stand up for themselves.

 

  And so, in the moment, when I think it's too cold outside and they need to have a coat on, and they say, “No. I'm hot and sweating, Mom.” I need to take a minute to slow down, and think about, what do I really want my child to know?

 

  I want her to know that I believe in her body. I trust her to listen to her body. I trust her to tune in; check in. “Are you really too hot? What will you do if you start to get cold? How will you know you're starting to get cold? Okay. I trust you.” And then she takes off her coat, runs around and puts it back on when she's cold, and I can completely trust her and not.

 

  It's easy to just kind of go through the motions of these things and think, “Just what are we communicating to our kids, when we insist that they wear a coat when they're saying, “I’m hot.” It’s just a silly thing. Of course, I'm in Wisconsin. It gets really, really cold here, and of course, they have to wear coats when it’s dangerously cold.

​

  But when it’s in a borderline area, I want my kids to practice listening to themselves and trusting their intuition. Because it's I think it's so hard for us, as moms, to trust our intuition, because we've lived our whole lives being told not to. And I don’t want that for my kids.

​

Diana:    Yeah… Oh, that's very interesting.

 

Laura:    I feel like that wasn't a great answer to your question but I mean getting curious with yourself and deciding what it is that you really want and how can your day-to-day parenting influence that long term outcome that you want.

 

Diana:    Ding-ding-ding. Awesome... Oh, I love that… Okay. So, Laura, where can they find you?

 

  Well, hold on. I just want to say that I really loved this conversation. Like that was…

 

Laura:    Thank you.

 

Diana:    Just being able to dive into stuff like that, that I feel like is not talked about very often. And so, one of my Mom Training topics is emotional mental coping. And I would say that this is like part relationship communication, part emotional mental coping, of being able to know where you're at, and like what you need and how to take care of yourself to be balanced?

 

  So, I just feel like this isn't talked about a lot. So, I really appreciate you being willing to dive in to this topic and share your wisdom with us. I loved it.

 

Laura:    Oh, thanks so much. It was so much fun to talk. Obviously, I like to nerd out on some of these things, so I was so happy to be able to, I don’t know, join you in this conversation. It was a lot of fun for me to.

 

Diana:    Yeah, totally. So, where can they find you? I know that you do awesome on Instagram. You guys, she does lots of videos about… She does themes during different months. She's really fun to follow on Instagram. So, I know that they can follow you on Instagram, and I'll put your Instagram in the show notes. But do you have any other places that they can find you?

 

Laura:    Yeah, yeah. So, if you'd like this sort of conversation. This is the conversation I have every week on my podcast the Balanced Parents. So, I would love to have you all come over and hang out with me. And, yeah, we talk about relationships, marriage, parenting, and taking really good care of yourself too.

 

 So, we cover it all as a marriage and family therapist should. But yeah, I don't know, I spend most of my time on Instagram, these days. I really like making reels.

 

Diana:   Yeah. No, you do… They're fun. I like them. I like how you do them. Yeah. Okay. So, we'll put that info in the show notes, because we definitely want them to connect with you. And so, ladies, I hope you've enjoyed today and hopefully you can pull something from it, that we talked about today. To be able to apply to your own life, and help yourself be more responsive, instead of reactive. And to enjoy your parenting more.

 

  And we'll see you next Tuesday on The Mom Training Podcast.

​