Giving and Receiving a Break

Episode Transcript

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The Mom Training Podcast with Diana Ballard

 

Diana:      Hey ladies, welcome to The Mom Training Podcast. Today we’re going to talk about giving and receiving a break. And I’m talking about like ourselves a break, giving other people a break, give our spouses a break… Let’s dig into this.

 

  So, do we give ourselves grace and others grace, as we live life together. So, there are times, literally in our life where we can’t show up the same way that we always have. For example, you’ve heard in my podcast a couple of months ago, whatever, that when I was sick for such a long time… It was like six and a half weeks of feeling like complete crap, when I was eight to nine months pregnant.

 

  I was so freaking sick, I couldn't hold school, I could barely take care of my kids like the fact that everybody survived during that time - like they ate so many carbs. I mean it's like, “Go have a piece of bread.” I don't even buy Eggo Waffles but we had so many go waffles during that time of like, “Here, you can make this on your own. Go pop this in the toaster.” So many snacks, I mean my kids literally took care of themselves for a long time.

 

  I had to cancelled everything with my business which was total… Like it was very humbling, and I had to refund people, I mean it wasn't fun.

 

  It started from that weird bacteria from… I think I got it from eating sushi at a new place and then I got COVID which then turned into pneumonia. And oh my gosh… Literally, there was no way, I could even show up at all like normal. I couldn't keep my normal commitments or be there for anybody else. I couldn't keep any form of routine, organization.

 

  My husband came home when I first started COVID and he's like, “Well, what are we doing with this? Where does this go? Where’s the laundry?” I’m like, “There's absolutely no order. There is no amount of order right now in this house, with food, with the laundry, with the cleaning schedule, with taking care of everybody. Like there's literally no structure. So, I’m so sorry. You're on your own. Good luck.” [chuckle]

 

  There was literally… I didn't have a thought in my head of how to organize anything, of how to take care of everything because I was just so sick. And there can be times in our life that we literally can't show up the same way that we normally do, and the way that we want to show up. Because believe it or not, we have expectations for ourselves. We have standards for ourselves. We have ways of living and there are moments where that’s just not going to happen.

 

  So, I had to utilize help from others and ask for major grace and patience with people that I interacted with, especially, that I had commitments with or meetings or the ladies in Mom Training. Oh my gosh, like literally, I was like, “Please, just I need some… I need a break. Please, stick with me because I am literally still sick. I can barely do anything.”

 

  And I had to let go of so many of those expectations for myself. So, during these types of moments, we can be plead for others to give us break, another chance, not give up on us, whatever. And we hope that they will.

 

  But do we give ourselves a break when we're not perfect, we're down out, we're going through a hard time? Do we give ourselves that break and that grace? I'm all about pushing ourselves, getting past excuses. But can we let go and let ourselves have a human moment, let ourselves have down time or time to heal? Like when there are those hard times, do we give ourselves a break?

 

  I mean what is our process with others? Yeah, if someone’s continually abusing the human card, meaning they’re not honoring you, not sincere, maybe last-minute cancellations all the time, being disrespectful… Then yeah, it's not cool and it's time to move on.

 

  But overall, I feel like we can be pretty understanding with people who are going through a hard time. And again, are they going to be perfect in responding or communicating at the moment? No. But, hopefully, we can be understanding and loving towards the situation and the person we’re interacting with.

 

  So, I want you to think of the two different sides - when was the last time you gave grace to somebody that is going through a hard time? Like maybe they dropped the ball on something, they are moving in the middle of a workweek, and may they miss somethings or a family members forgets, someone forgets to hang out with you. Or even more extreme, like they completely can't be there for you for certain things…

 

  When was the last time you gave somebody grace? And I guarantee, you can think of a couple situations in that last year where you practiced grace for somebody, where you were like, “Oh, it's okay. I totally understand. That's fine. We can move it. We can reschedule. Thanks for telling me that you're struggling.” Or someone goes through a really hard time, and you’re like, “Oh my gosh, what can I do to help them and be there for them.”

 

  Then flip it over to the other side, of are you going through a hard time right now? Have you gone through a hard time in the recent past? Have you given yourself grace? Have you let yourself be in the moment and slow down?

 

  A lot of us don't really like to slow down. Especially, if we're working on things or we have a good flow going and then all of a sudden, like something hits us. Some human moments that we’re like, “Oh my gosh, I legit have to stay in bed all day. I can't do anything else.” Or I legit need to sit on the couch and snuggle my kids, and watch TV because if I get up then I have a big coughing fit or I'm completely exhausted or just different… Or there's things you’re struggling with, with keeping up with your household, your finances, different things.

 

  And you might need to sleep more. You might need to take a break. You might need to have more fun or just let yourself decompress; talk to a friend. Let's have grace with ourselves in those moments and with those around us when they have those moments too. Because we never know when a moment might come up where were the ones that are severely falling short and needing people to be kind to us.

 

  Let’s be kind to ourselves during these challenging moments that we're having. Be kind to others as they are struggling, as they are living life the best they can, and maybe having circumstances and things happen that just aren't fun. So, let's be kind to ourselves in our struggles. Be kind to those around us and let’s make the world a better place. And we'll see you next Tuesday on The Mom Training Podcast.

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